1. Don’t yell in the face
The law forbids physical punishment. Everyone knows it, but few do. The experience of an angry and powerless adult yelling, “What WAS I just saying about smearing that banana over your flight suit?! Do you think I said it for fun? Why don’t you ever listen to me?! Hell, I just have to repeat it!’
2. Avoid lying
A lie is not the truth. This is true even if the goal is to make the picky stick healthier (‘no honey, there are no vegetables in the sauce, it’s all meat’). This is when you try to protect yourself or your child from an unpleasant truth (‘Grandma is not sick, she is just too busy to pick you up from kindergarten’ or ‘no honey, father and mother are not going to divorce’).
3. Avoid threatening
‘Mother will go without you if you don’t come soon!’ Do you know that strip? Then there will be no ice cream when I cannot find the goods on the shelf. Or the classic “if you don’t open your mouth now, you might forget the goodnight story!”
A threat is a warning that if the child does not obey, bad things will happen (or something good does not happen that the child wants and may have been looking forward to). We threaten when weak. When we can’t get the kid to do right or are too busy to get what we want now.
4. Avoid being fickle – but feel free to change your mind
‘May I have a biscuit, I’m so hungry?’ (But we have to eat!) Can I get another? It’s almost time for lunch! ‘Can’t we just watch the movie again?’ ‘Does Vitus have to play at home?’ (Oh, I can’t stand it today!) And so on. It’s hard to make good decisions for everyday life and upbringing while also wanting happy kids. Determining the best solution in a given situation can be difficult, and you may end up being fat with your decision – or making the wrong choice and regretting it.
If you keep calling, I have to run up and down the stairs, which exhausts my legs. The late-night goodnight ritual may sound like this. It’s tiring not wanting to take off your rubber boots in the morning, and then getting scolded by your boss. Life as a mom can be so demanding and stressful at times that it’s tempting to feign fatigue. The demands are endless, and who really helps?
You adore him
It’s okay to adore your child. Never be afraid to show your child that you will always be there for him, no matter what happens or what he does.
Your child is a tiny human being with full rights to his personality. It doesn’t mean you have to always obey the child, but you must acknowledge her feelings, such as “I can see you’re angry that we’re going home now.”
You are your child’s guide in a new world. You are not evil for deciding to go home, bed, or clean up. You’re just a good mom taking charge.
These are the most common upbringing sins. Try to exhale for work before you pick up for ten minutes outside the nursery on a bench. Remembering yourself makes you a better mother.